Art is therapeutic

The other day one of my friends was really surprised to see my pictures on Facebook, since he didn't really know that I was into creative photography. He asked me about what made me get interested in this type of photography. And then I thought about it for a while, and I knew the answer was not that simple. I started giving it a little more thought, how in the world did I decide to start taking pictures? I knew I had been doing it for fun, because it gave me pleasure and it made me happy, but there had to be a better reason to explain how I got into photography.
In the summer of 2010, I graduated from college with a science degree. What was supposed to happen next? A job, graduate school, medical school, get maried

My abuelita and I when I was around 16y/o.

and have a family? Well, none of these things followed after graduation. Not a single one. I became part of the statistics, an addition to the unemployment list of this country. As someone who has always planned out every single detail and who was always in control of the situation, at that point, I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. Not a clue. Wow, that was a bold statement that I never thought I would share publicly.
A little before my college graduation, my grandmother, my best friend, my confidant, my role model, passed away. Her passing will always have a major significance in my life, not only because of what she represented in my life, but also because of when she passed away. She left me right before my college graduation, on the day of my birthday. How was I supposed to take that? Why on earth did she have to die on my birthday? Needless to say, this carried over with my inability to move forward in life. I didn't know how to get out of the bottomless pit. Now that almost three years have passed, I can look back at it with more clarity, and understand that this is a sign that she never left me, and will be forever with me.


I was given a fancy point-and-shoot camera as a graduation present, and since I had nothing better to do with my time then, I started shooting some pictures and learned how to use editing programs. I eventually found a job, but I kept going back to taking pictures and trying to learn more and improve my skills.

My niece (and beautiful model) Bella and me

 Things did get better. In fact, thanks to all of my not-so-pleasant experiences, I'm a now a firm believer that things always get better. I slowly started redefining my goals in life and somehow I patiently climbed out of my rabbit hole. I applied and got accepted to graduate school, something that I had not completely envisioned before. I was very excited to start, yet I was still the naive, inexperienced girl in many aspects of life. I still had a long way to go, and way too many things to learn.

One of my favorite pictures featuring my niece :)

And then my graduate school journey began. To make the story short, graduate school was not at all what my naive self was expecting, and that took a tremendous toll on my physical and emotional health. Without going too much into details, I saw myself in front of a huge mountain that I thought I could never climb, but instead, a mountain that would fall on me like an avalanche, and get the best of me. I was back again in that endless pit. But this time I really did think it was the end. I felt like I had hit rock bottom in every single aspect of my life, and I could not even see the dimmest ray of light at the end of the tunnel.

Isn't the light gorgeous?

The living room in my apartment faces west, so when I get home in the early evening, I can see the beautiful sunshine before the sun goes down. That magnificent light inspired me one afternoon to snap some pictures, after a really long time of not even looking at my camera. And once again, I found myself gradually crawling out of my desperation. This time I needed a little more than just my own pep talks, but thankfully I reached out for help in time.

My apartment when it's clean (I adore the light in the background, and you can also see my pics on the right side of the window)

 Where am I going with this long blurb about my life? I would like to let you know, yes, you, who is reading this post that there is always light, but you have to look for it. My photography has helped me to heal a lot of aspects in my life that were broken, and I now find myself often looking for the best angle of things. This mindset forces me to always look at the pretty side of things, my eyes are frequently in search of the best lighting, the best angles, and the prettiest sights. This reflects in my personal life, and I try to do the same when the weather is looking kind of cloudy.
Folks, art can heal broken hearts. Art is therapeutic. It forces you to take your deepest emotions and transform them into the most beautiful forms of art. I encourage you to look at your life as a masterpiece in progress. Write a song or a poem when you are sad, sing your heart out  when things are not going well, paint a beautiful work of art from what is hurting you deep inside. Take the ugly, painful and unpleasant things, and transform your feelings into art. Be an artist.

One of my favorite pics of all time

Why is the sky blue?

Today was mostly a cloudy, unadventurous, wintery day. But late in the afternoon, the sun came out and the sky looked orange. It wasn't a bloody orange like when the sky is on fire during those warm summer evenings, but it was rather a peachy, delicately coral-tinted sky. And as the sun was slowly setting, the shadows in the clouds turned a light purple. It was a majestic color show.
While I was delighting my sight in those beautiful hues, I wondered why the sky wasn't orange, or purple, or green, or any other color but blue. Why, out of all the colors of the rainbow, the sky had to be blue when the sun is shining upon the earth. I could go on a scientific explanation about why the sky is the color it is, and why there are clouds, and why the sun wakes us up in the morning and puts us to bed at night. But for once in my life, I decided that such a beautiful thing needed no further explanation, that it was okay to just sit back and enjoy the show. I won't worry about why the sky is blue, or why there are fish in the ocean and how four-legged creatures evolved from them. Today, I will breathe in the smell of winter roses and feel the cold in my bones. Today, I will forget about the things that trouble me, and I will just look at the sky and forget to ask why it is blue.

Of princesses and real life

I'm at a coffee shop, listening to Christmas music while I grade my students' papers. The holiday sounds, the busy atmosphere of people coming in and out, the energizing smell of roasted coffee and the endless pile of work to do, for some strange reason, remind me of my undergraduate days. I remember spending countless hours in my school's library, studying, daydreaming, hiding from the masses, because, believe it or not, being surrounded by books makes me feel safe.

I grew up with my nose stuck in books. I loved to read. And I still do. But what I read now might be slightly different from what I used to read back in the day.

I loved fairy tales, just like any little girl would. I was fascinated with stories about foreign and beautiful places, where princes traveled across the seas to find their princesses. Or the stories where good always triumphs over evil. Where the poor suffers and one day teaches the rich a lesson. Yes, I also liked those kinds of stories. And I still do, perhaps because I think of my life itself as a fairy tale, as a work of art in the making. A story that will have a happy ending.

"Life itself is the most wonderful fairy tale." ~Hans Christian Andersen

 

 



 

 

Home is where the heart is

On Sunday, it will be my first year anniversary living in a new city. A year ago, I could not even picture in my head the kind of trouble I was getting myself into. I feel like I have grown more in one year than I have in all my life. I have seen the ugly side of people, of things, of life. My naive, carefree self is gone, and I have had to learn many things the hard way. But even after all these harsh experiences that have tried to strip away my essence, a little spark in me remains, a flame that screams who I am to the world, a voice that has never pronounced my name more clear and more loudly. I am who I am thanks to all those tears, smiles, broken-hearted dreams, and sleepless nights. I am not afraid to be my unique self anymore, because everything I do has my personal signature in it. I am me, and I have never been happier to be me.

If you never say your name out loud to anyone, they can never ever call you by it.

 ~Regina Spektor

Late afternoon light

art:  [mass noun] the expression or application of human creative skill and imagination, typically in a visual form such as painting or sculpture, producing works to be appreciated primarily for their beauty or emotional power.

Sometimes I wonder whether what I do in my every day life is art or not. I say it depends on how you look at things. Being an extremely sensitive person, I pour a lot of my emotions into what I do. So in a way, what I do on a daily basis does have some sort of emotional power. It has a part of me.

My photography is important for me because it represents who I am and how I see the world. It has my essence and my name written all over it. And it captures an instant that is forever gone, yet I can relive it whenever I want. And preserving that part of life that is already gone is like knowing that that moment will always be with you, no matter what.

Art is everywhere. Even ordinary life can be artistic. It depends on how we decide to make it.